This post has been a long time coming for me. I want to address so many things on my mind.
1. Personal Perception of body – I don’t know if anyone has noticed that most of the pictures I post are not of me. Yes it is mostly because I take a lot of the family photos but I also do it on purpose. I hate the way I look on film. I don’t want my girls growing up this way. I want them to look in the mirror and see the beautiful girls that they are, every mother wants that for their daughter.
2. Public Perception of body – This is the way the public perceives heavy people. The other night I was watching one of my favorite shows with my daughter “Face Off” which is a competition for special effects artists. This show happened to be about the 7 deadly sins and of course there was gluttony. The artist that did gluttony made this costume:
Of course my daughter looks at me while this costume is being made and asks for me to define gluttony so I pull up Wikipedia and read this to her – Gluttony, derived from the Latin gluttire meaning to gulp down or swallow, means over-indulgence and over-consumption of food, drink, or wealth items to the point of extravagance or waste.
My sweet daughter looks at me and says why is he making a heavy person then? Of course I have to think a moment but then I tell her that people think of a fat person when they hear the word gluttony, people think that heavy people are heavy because they eat too much. My daughter was appalled with this explanation and said “Mommy don’t they know some people are heavy because they are sick?”. This is when I go into Mom mode and tell her that people aren’t nice sometimes.
3. My Perception of my body – When I look in the mirror I don’t see the beautiful, exotic women in the first picture (at least not always). I definitely don’t see the costume in the second picture. I see a totally different picture, I am not always happy with the image staring back at me (but who is?) and there are things I want to change.
What brought this post on you ask? Well my husband has lost a lot of weight…I am talking over 130 pounds in less than 9 months. How you ask? With diet and exercise. He accomplished something I have been working on ALL MY LIFE in less than 9 months. No I am not mad at him (actually very proud of him) and no I am not jealous of him. I just want to know how it was so dang easy for him. Yes I know that a man’s metabolism is different from a woman’s and men get results faster.
But I am a bit deflated, I have been dealing with a weight issue (or so I thought) since I was a child. I was always teased, tortured and tormented in school. And as an adult it is responsible for some really stupid mistakes.
So now what? Well I am going to give the weight loss one more shot. I am going to eat properly and exercise (as much as I can), and I am going to read Health at Every Size by Linda Bacon. I am going to look at my health in a different perspective and learn about myself. Maybe this will get me on the right path. I don’t want to see making myself healthy as a punishment. I just need to find a happy medium so I can be successful. Just like my darling husband.
I wanted to show off my husband’s success!
I will definitely check in with other posts about the book, how I am doing, and how I am feeling.
I hope you enjoyed this post and learned something from it.
As always I welcome comments, suggestions and even just a hello.